


Aftermath

by SilverAmoebasquid



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: //fighting, Gen, Post-Canon, fist-fight, happy 3/10 i love these two fools, let them love each other with their fists, love fighting tho...
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-10
Updated: 2018-03-10
Packaged: 2019-03-29 15:03:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13929552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverAmoebasquid/pseuds/SilverAmoebasquid
Summary: Shirabu thought the fallout would be lonely. He never imagined the person he felt he betrayed the most would be the one refusing to leave his side in the aftermath.





	Aftermath

**'** So that was it, **'** Shirabu mused, staring out the window of the bus as it bounced over minute bumps in the street, usually the red carpet the Shiratorizawa Volleyball Club walked as they stepped off another court and came down from the high of another victory. But not today.

Kawanishi was in the seat beside him, usually asleep by now on the way home from tournaments. Today the middle blocker stared at the seat in front of him, blinking every few seconds, breathing steadily, not moving, not speaking.

The bus was usually full of laughter and chatting and loud music after games. Today, it was silent aside from the commentary in Shirabu’s head, narrating the last match of his second year, play-by-play.

In the seat ahead of him, Tendou and Semi sat still, not falling over each other, not yelling, not turning around to give him grief, just sitting.

Across the aisle, Ushijima and Reon shared their usual bench. At the beginning of the ride, they had talked softly to one another with their heads ducked, probably about the match. They were silent now too.

In the seat in front of them, Goshiki and Yamagata leaned against each other, the remnants of tears still streaking the face of the young wing spiker.

Shirabu looked back out the window and the view that flew by him, the same as every time they drove this route, win or lose.

 

**'** Did the practice serves even help? **'** Shirabu wondered, dragging himself out of the gymnasium. He hurt everywhere from the intensive tournament match earlier in the day followed immediately by a penalty of 100 practice serves. Usually, Shirabu devoted every ounce of his concentration to practice, but today, the session flew by and he didn’t even remember if he’d done well or not. What Shirabu had noticed the most was the person standing next to him, the one who didn’t need the practice serves, who served perfectly the entire match without breaking a sweat.

Semi’s expression didn’t shift from neutral for the duration of the practice session, serving successfully and powerfully each time, definitely breaking a sweat now.

Shirabu followed the rest of his dejected team into the locker room after they’d finally been dismissed. Something scratched at the walls of Shirabu’s heart as he showered, some pest making a nest in the empty pit inside of him where his pride used to live.

 

**‘** Leave it all on the court, **’** Shirabu sometimes heard from teammates and mentors. ‘Don’t hold anything back. Don’t go home with any regrets.’

Leaving it all on the court was a great rule to live by until you had nothing left in you when everything you were wasn’t enough. It was still too silent and it made Shirabu squirm as he changed into clean clothes. He longed for Goshiki to come pester him about being the ace or for Tendou to come rest an elbow on his head and make a short joke. All the things that usually annoyed him, he suddenly missed now that they weren’t there.

One of those things was Semi’s posture, always making him look confident and cocky as he left the locker room, no matter how practice had gone that day. It had always infuriated Shirabu, how Semi could look composed and unruffled no matter what, his attitude always radiating composure.

Tonight, Semi slunk out of the locker room without pausing to talk to anyone, shoulders slumped and eyes straight ahead.

It made Shirabu even angrier. Semi wasn’t the one who needed to look ashamed. He had played perfectly, doing his job exactly how he was supposed to.

Shirabu was the one who had failed the team.

 

**‘** May the best setter stand on the court, **’** Shirabu scoffed, his hands jammed into his pockets as he stalked up to the second year dorms, letting his thoughts escape his lips in a soft murmur. “Yeah right. If it had been you, we would’ve won.”

“You know, if you keep talking to yourself like that, people are going to think you’re crazy.”

Shirabu whirled around, almost tripping in the process. “Semi-san!”

Semi sifted a hand through his hair, looking sheepish. “Sorry, I meant to come find you right after practice, but you were giving everyone demon eyes.”

“Demon eyes?” Shirabu glared.

Semi laughed, a sound too carefree for the current atmosphere. “Yeah, like that, only less pout and more eyebrows.”

“What do you want?” Shirabu took a step back, crossing his arms. He wasn’t ready for this, not now. He needed at least one sleepless night before he could look Semi in the eye and at least attempt coherent speech without feeling guilty.

“Just to talk.” The easy smile hadn’t left Semi’s face, even as he held his hands out defensively. “You played well today. Good job.”

Shirabu snapped. “I don’t need your pity!” He turned away, ready to make a break for it when a hand closed around his shoulder. “Get off me!”

“Dude, chill out!” Semi took a surprised step back.

“I’m sorry I took your spot and fucking failed the team!” Shirabu broke away and sprinted down the hallway to the nearest exterior door. He didn’t care if he got in trouble for running, he just needed the tightness in his chest to go away so he could breathe. He could still feel Semi’s eyes on him; he hadn’t run far enough yet. Even when he was back outside with the cool, night air on his skin, he couldn’t escape the last expression Semi had given him.

Within minutes, the door opened again, Shirabu’s ears picking up the sound from where he wandered in the courtyard, kicking loose gravel around.

“Shirabu? I’m not mad at you if that’s what you think.”

“I don’t care. I just want to be left alone.”

“Not tonight. I don’t think I want you to be left alone tonight.”

Shirabu sneered and turned around. “You don’t trust me to be on my own? Think I’m not stable?”

“No...” Semi spoke slowly. “But I can see you’re hurting and you shouldn’t have to be alone when you’re hurting.”

“Why can’t you just be angry at me? It’d be easier that way.”

“Shirabu? I’m not following.”

Blinking slowly, Shirabu seated himself on the ground, looking up at the first stars of the evening, beginning to show. “Just reprimand me for losing so it’s less confusing. All this comfort shit is throwing me off.”

“Shirabu, if I come over there, this door is going to lock behind me and we're going to have to go in through the main doors and explain what we were doing out here. Is that what you want?”

“I don't care,” Shirabu shrugged. “You're the one insisting on comforting me."

The door clicked shut and Semi approached, placing himself on the ground directly across from Shirabu, his legs tucked underneath him. “You’re not doubting your abilities, are you?”

“Why wouldn’t I?” Shirabu sighed. “Shiratorizawa had a streak. We always make it to nationals. What changed? Me. I’m the weakest link. We could’ve made it if you were still the starter.”

Semi exhaled. “We had this conversation when Washijou made you starting lineup. You were the best choice for this team and I believe that. It’s not your fault Karasuno won.”

“What about next year? How am I supposed to come back and keep playing when I have the legacy of the setter who lost to an underdog team? How am I supposed to keep playing for the team I failed?”

Shirabu felt the sting across his face as his head snapped to the side and looked up in surprise.

Semi was glaring at him, hand still raised from the slap. “I didn’t give my spot to a loser.”

Eyes narrowing again just as fast, Shirabu lunged at Semi, pushing him to the ground and kneeling on top of him. “I open up to you about how I'm feeling and you respond by hitting me? I just wanted to impress you! I didn’t mean to disappoint you!”

“You didn’t disappoint me until you let yourself get defeated!” Semi flung Shirabu to the side and elbowed him hard in the ribs. “So don’t you _dare_ do it again!”

Shirabu threw two punches that landed on Semi’s waist and threw him off, allowing him the upper hand again, wrenching Semi’s arm behind his back, shoving his chest into the ground, both breathing hard.

Semi gave a breathy chuckle. “You still feel like giving up?”

Huffing, Shirabu let Semi go, blushing and sitting down again. “What was that all about?”

“Making sure you still had some fight left in you. If you’re strong enough to beat my ass off after today, you have the strength to keep playing, alright?”

“I won’t let you down again,” Shirabu stated, looking back up at the sky. “I earned my place on this team and I’m going to earn it every single day I come to practice so I never let you down again.”

Semi smiled. “I didn’t realize you thought about me so much in relation to the lineup.”

“I know what I did to you.” Shirabu shifted. There would probably be bruises where Semi had hit him. There would probably be bruises where he hit Semi. “It scares me sometimes, looking at the shoes I have to fill, that I’m trying to fill.”

“Anyone else, I might actually be worried about that. But it’s you and you’ve been filling my shoes perfectly since the day you stepped on that court.”

Shirabu blushed. “Shut up... Neither of us had a choice in the lineup.”

Semi nodded, getting back to his feet. He offered a hand down to Shirabu. “Well, either way, I’m glad.”

Standing up on his own, specifically ignoring Semi’s hand, Shirabu raised one eyebrow at his senpai. “Even though it ended up like this?”

“ _Because_ it ended up like this,” Semi promised, moving toward the school’s front door, the only one that would be unlocked at this time of the night. “We both learned things we needed to learn, I think. I learned something about my own abilities to adapt and I learned how to rely on people like you who never let me down. What did you learn?”

Shirabu shot a fist out again, connecting with Semi’s arm. “That you’re a sap.”

“Ow! What the fuck?” Semi laughed. “Maybe you need to learn a few more things before I leave.”

The thought of graduation sombered Shirabu again. He had to lead this team in the future and he couldn’t let one loss hold him down. He owed it to Semi and the rest of his team to keep fighting. “I’m learning that I’m not alone,” Shirabu admitted, holding the front door open for Semi.

The third year looked happily surprised at the comment, but broke away to explain to the frowning front desk attendant what they had been doing outside at night and why they were both dirty from wrestling on the courtyard ground.

Shirabu took slow steps toward his dorm until Semi caught up with him again, smacking his shoulder.

“Don’t just leave me to do all the talking. Rude.”

“Stop hitting me.” Shirabu smirked. “Thank you for believing in me and not letting me be alone.”

Semi’s faint smile illuminated the dark hallway and he let his arm brush Shirabu’s as they walked. “You’re welcome. I expect you’ll be up early tomorrow morning to practice before class?”

“Probably.” Shirabu wasn’t about to admit that Semi had him perfectly figured out.

“Get some rest then. I’ll meet you there if you want me.”

“Sure.” Shirabu paused with his hand on the door to his room. “I thought the fallout was going to be lonely. I felt like I betrayed you and I was going to have to work through this alone but you haven’t left my side...”

Semi’s smile hadn’t faded a bit. “It doesn’t have to be lonely. Come here?”

Shirabu stepped hesitantly into the hug, letting the warmth of Semi’s arms protect him from the cold hallway and the creeping feeling of disappointment before separating and slipping into his dorm with a small wave.

 

**‘** It doesn’t have to be lonely, **’** Shirabu repeated to himself, sitting on the edge of his bed, eyes glued to the window and the stars lighting up the night outside. He was lucky that for all the day’s disappointments and new bruises, he didn’t have to be alone in the aftermath.

**Author's Note:**

> (warning: rant)  
> If you asked me my thoughts on SemiShira a year ago, I would've probably wrinkled my nose and told ya to eat shit. This definitely wasn't something I used to like at all. A lot of people's portrayals of SemiShira made me really uncomfortable and left me thinking that this wasn't a respectful ship with good dynamics. Fortunately, plenty of people have been showing me The Truth of how good and soft and healthy this can actually be and now SemiShira is one of my top ships and I wouldn't have it any other way. Most of the credit for that must be given in due turn to Ryan and Saf especially for being the people I talk SemiShira with. It's you guys who get me fired up about these fools and got me to a place where I saw this ship as a beautiful thing so thank you. This is for you guys and everyone else I've talked SemiShira with, making my world that much fluffier and happier. <3


End file.
